Thursday, November 27, 2008

so this is what's happening

i haven't had my phone since friday. i've been sick since saturday night. i haven't driven anywhere since then. i haven't slept more than a few hours at a time. on the other hand, i haven't been able to stay awake more than a few hours at a time. i haven't smoked until today. my stomach only want french fries with copious amounts of ketchup. i throw up at least once a day and threaten to do so much more often than that. i've spent my days in hospital beds, waiting room chairs, and curled up in my sheets. i have ice packs and juice boxes delivered to my room regularly. i'm not complaining, really. it's not bad, and i'm really well taken care of. it's just annoying and turns your world upside down a little. it's weird to be cut off from the world, be on a different schedule, your life revolving around one thing, your shitty health. i haven't even played with my clothes for days AND i have tons of new dresses to play with. that's how sick i am. these meds make me feel crazy and have weird, innappropriate dreams. we haven't had thanksgiving yet, something about a football game, i don't know, i'm sure it's stupid though. i can't think of a legitimate reason to postpone a holiday having to do with football. jon jon gets here tomorrow and i can't wait. he takes good care of me. my hippie, political protesting, guitar playing aunt also arrives tomorrow to celebrate the holiday with us. she annoys the shit out of my parents with her liberal ways so that's always appreciated. she's also terribly witty, which i enjoy being around. so we're having a late thanksgiving which is fine because holidays just make me all anxious anyhow, what with expectations and all, i mean, isn't that the quickest way to be disappointed? yeah, it's probably best not to have expectations. that's why i never make big new year's or birthday plans. hello, plans? meet disappointment. oh, you've already met? of course you have.